From Showing Up to Speaking Up – How Participation Actually Works

Open Toggle To Read Panel Intro

Many people attend meetings, events, or community activities, but hesitate to speak, lead, or take responsibility.

The space between showing up and speaking up is rarely about apathy. More often, it’s shaped by uncertainty, confidence, and not knowing how participation actually works.

This video explores participation as a process, not a performance. It looks at the internal questions people carry, the structures that shape voice and leadership, and how confidence grows through clarity and understanding.

Inside this reflection:

Why showing up is only the first step.

How people move from listening to contributing.

What confidence and responsibility look like in shared spaces.

How participation becomes stakeholdership over time.

As the United States approaches its 250th year, participation is not just symbolic. It depends on people who understand how to step in, not just that they are invited. It is a calm, reflective exploration meant to support understanding, confidence, and responsible engagement.

Thursday — 1:00 PM EST 3/19, 4/23, 6/11 – 2026

Watch Recordings or Read Transcripts

Showing Up With Purpose - (3:53 Min.) Randy Wright, Jr., Small Business Consultant

It’s been busy, you know. From five o’clock on, it’s been like…

And I was up and out at 7 AM, and just been zooming all day.

So I didn’t want to commit because I had a full plate, but I was going to try to make it.

So when that window opened up, I said, let me just switch over.

And I had to make a couple calls and get those out the way so I can at least, you know, stay buoyant and keep things moving forward.

Yeah.

Well, you know today’s topic is about showing up and speaking, so you show up.

I’m trying to just make the different schedules available when I send out links.

I don’t make it your obligation to come, but it’s an option and an opportunity anyway, so I keep them open.

Everyone has a different schedule.

Some have other meetings, just like you have to jump around.

Some are at work, they’re trying to have a lunch break.

And so for some reason, 2026 Zoom has kind of resurged.

You know, I have at least one Zoom meeting a day, sometimes two or three, and sometimes they conflict.

So I have to give priority to whatever schedule, because they’re planning for my presence to be there.

I’m involved in a few things, so I try to pick my spots.

When you come to a webinar, it’s a commitment.

Because they don’t just want bodies, and they don’t want to have a large audience of people sitting there saying nothing.

And there’s a certain amount of preparation involved.

If you’re going to be there, if you’re going to participate, you have to do your background—research your topic—and have something worthwhile to speak about.

Not just speak just to fill the airspace.

I don’t like to do that.

So, you know, I’ve been in meetings where people were talking, just rambling on, and they’re not really saying anything.

And I’m like, there’s somewhere else I could be right now.

You know, I want to make sure if I’m going to come, I’ve got to make sure that I’m prepared as much as I can be—and contribute.

Well, I believe in what you’re doing.

I know it takes a lot of commitment and a lot of work to put this together.

I can see the work.

So, you know, if you could put that much effort in, the least I could do is to show up and try to be involved.

You Never Know What Will Shift Your Perspective - (1:52 Min.) Randy Wright, Jr., Small Business Consultant

You never know what’s going to happen when you do something.

There’s a saying—I went to a fight and a hockey match broke out.

You know, in the National Hockey League, fighting is part of the sport, and there’s a percentage of people that show up just to watch that.

So it’s kind of a play on words when they say, I went to a fight and a hockey match broke out.

You never know when someone says something that resonates with you, or it gives you a different perspective of looking at things.

You know?

I think that in life, one of the keys to success with people in general is being able to look at things from multiple perspectives.

Because we all have a perspective, but that just represents one angle.

Sometimes when you change your position and you see things in a different light, you’re looking at the same thing—but you understand it differently.

And that’s why there’s a synergy in people coming together and discussing things, you know—because you never know when someone could say something that completely alters your perspective on something.

Finding the Right Moment to Speak - (3:23 Min.) Randy Wright, Jr., Small Business Consultant

I kind of look at speaking in America as being similar to driving during rush hour when you’re trying to make a left turn at an intersection.

If you wait for someone to allow you to go, you might be there for a while.

Sometimes you have to kind of nudge yourself out and show intent, and then somebody will allow you to go through.

I think also when it comes to speaking, you have to feel like you’re in a safe place to speak—that you have a gist of the topic at hand and something meaningful to add—where you’re not just talking just to say something or feel obligated to speak, that you actually want to contribute.

And you have to feel safe. You have to have a safe environment.

I had something happen to me this morning.

I was in a doctor’s waiting room, and the woman sitting next to me had a baby in the carriage, and the baby kept looking at me.

So I did what a lot of adults do—I started to make baby faces.

And the baby’s just straight-faced, looking at me making the baby faces. And I thought it was fun.

And then at one point the baby started to cry, and then the mother looked at me like, what are you doing?

But my interpretation of having fun with the baby and the baby’s interpretation of it were different.

The baby is saying, I don’t know you. Who are you? Why are you looking at me like that? Why are you puffing your face out like that?

The baby felt threatened because the baby didn’t have familiarity.

So—and we’ve all done that at some point—where you speak sometimes, if you jump in too soon, you don’t really, you know, know the flow of the subject matter and what’s been discussed previously.

It’s like talking to the baby.

You really want to, you know, get a feel for where the conversation is going, and then you can feel like whatever you say is going to contribute to it.

So that would lead to hesitation.

You know, you want to get a feel and feel safe and feel comfortable before you jump in.

We Are All Cultural Ambassadors - (4:12 Min.) Randy Wright, Jr., Small Business Consultant

You made a good point, Norman, about being an ambassador.

I have some friends that are from Japan, and oftentimes when you meet, they will give you a gift.

And the American culture is when someone gives you a gift, initially you refuse—you know, that’s modesty—or thank you, but no thank you.

But in the Japanese culture, it’s considered an insult if you don’t accept it.

So we’re all ambassadors of our culture, and when we’re in a cross-cultural environment, it’s a learning opportunity and a teaching opportunity—to show people that there are different ways to do the same thing, and you learn each other’s culture that way.

Part of the American culture—not so much from a historical standpoint—but in America, I think part of the culture depends upon family size.

If you come from a small family, everyone takes turns, and we all wait until the opportunity to speak when the person finishes making their point.

If you come from a large family where you get together for Sunday dinner and everyone’s talking at the same time, you might have two or three conversations going on, and you don’t lose place with the different things.

You might be talking to your Uncle Joe about the game, and you might be talking to your nephew about a political matter, and you have two different conversations going on, and you keep pace, and everyone is speaking at the same time, and you jump in and out of different conversations.

So I think that that’s part of the American culture—it’s based on the family dynamics as well.

But I think that we all have a responsibility, if not an outright obligation, to represent the culture and to use it as a teaching moment.

Because if not here, then where? If not now, then when?

And you’re in a friendly, open environment—it’s a great opportunity to say, in my culture, this is how we do things.

Because the baby that I met this morning felt fearful because the baby didn’t know me.

I was comfortable with the baby, but the baby wasn’t comfortable with me.

And I don’t speak baby language, and the baby wasn’t old enough to speak English.

So the baby didn’t understand why this guy dressed in black is making faces at me.

And the baby looked at me, and the only response he had was to cry.

And I said, oh—got to back up.

Mama gave me the look, and she saw I was smiling.

She said, don’t worry, it happens all the time.

People always make faces at my baby, and he’s not old enough to express himself yet.

He doesn’t have language, so the only thing he can do is cry.

Learning Participation Through Observation and Culture - (3:16 Min.) Norman Chu, Chicago / NYC

I think participation, to me, is by learning—but also sometimes when we come to a new country.

Okay, so of course I’ve been here a long time, but I find like—I was from Hong Kong, a busy place.

But in New York—New York City—the bus terminal, I’m talking about the commuter bus and long-distance bus, Greyhound-type of terminal—

When we enter the terminal after work, like in the afternoon, people would hold the door for me.

Now, I thought New Yorkers were as busy as people in Hong Kong, but in my memory, people in Hong Kong don’t hold the door for me—but in New York, they do.

So it’s by all these observations that I learned how to respond to people—say thank you, or just walk a little faster.

Another time was—I was in Gracie Mansion, also the mayor’s residence of New York City.

It was an African American type of conference or festival.

I remember I was probably the only Chinese present there.

No Chinese reporter, no Chinese civic advocate or person—I was the only one.

But I feel, you know, at the time I had already been in New York long enough—almost fifteen to more than twenty years—then I felt at ease.

So I get to know people and be maybe some ambassador from the Chinese community.

So these things happened naturally to me.

But of course, initially, I was—I heard from Celine that we were taught to respect people.

So we don’t—I don’t—like we have a hard time doing face-to-face, maybe interviews from dignity, or what we call like professors and this and that for the oral test—because we don’t look at them in their eyes, and they find it disrespectful.

But in our face, this is the most respect that we give to them—looking at the floor and answering their question.

So that’s things that I relate to communication.

Turning Experience into Opportunity for Others - (2:43 Min.) Norman Chu, Chicago / NYC

If I help remind me—my friend, a doctor, a lady, pursued another route.

She was like—this was around at least thirty-plus years ago, at those decades.

Of course, at that time, doctors had to pass through the interview, like the board interview, to become a doctor—even if they passed all the other requirements.

And she is Chinese, from Hong Kong.

But as I said before, our respect to the authority people that have power is to look down to the floor—not looking up to the ceiling, but looking down at the floor.

So she didn’t pass.

She’s a pediatric—pediatrician—and physiology.

So after she passed it—because she learned it the hard way—she probably didn’t pass it the first or second time.

She started to write books to coach foreign medical students that are trying to get licensed in the United States.

And she was very successful, and she sold a lot of books.

But that book is the only thing that made the impact for that interview or that series of interviews.

I don’t know, because I was not benefiting from it, because I’m not a doctor.

But I think psychologically, and in exact procedure-wise—how to make an impact in an interview—that book made a difference.

And she herself is a shy person—a professional, a pediatrician—and physiology—that made a difference to a lot of people.

So they might pass the interview at the first shot.

So that’s also one way to really actively participate.

Stepping In When You’re the Only One - (2:13 Min.) Norman Chu, Chicago / NYC

I, I, I think this is really good—that when, say, I am, or one of us are in a situation that we are the only person there from whatever community—like African American, Hispanic, Chinese, or Filipino, whatever.

I think there’s only three choices.

But the first one is to participate with the background—maybe we probably have experience to participate—or I’ll try, maybe with the upbringing, a family, or open family, say okay, since nobody’s there, I just be there smiling and see what I can do, right?

Mingle with the situation and get the best out of it—like learning and participating.

The other one—you say no, no, no, not me.

So I think the first two are active and proactive—and more active participation.

The last one is more like, yeah, I still stuck in my head, my so-called identity, or being a nice boy or girl.

Yeah, but that may not bring the best result, because it’s always the first time.

If I postpone my first time of being participative—

Let’s just say Weihaur said, oh, me? One of the five that impact the city or state’s policy on, you know, health?

Why me?

But you don’t have time to think, because that’s the moment to at least express your honest opinion for something.

Learning to Speak Up Across Cultures - (5:05 Min.) Weihaur Lau, Planning Committee, DOI250AA, Founder, Awaken Inner Voices

But I think a lot of times, very cultural—something we point out—is very cultural for Asian Americans to feel like we are guests in this country, and we have to ask for permission—can I do this? Is this the time for me to speak up?

We kind of—not just being like one of the themes we talk about here in this initiative—is that we are not just being treated as guests, but we treat ourselves as that.

We still live inside our corner of like Chinatown or something like that. We operate very culturally, and we don’t know some of these cultural nuances—that, you know, we feel like we have to ask for permission to speak.

I think at first, I found that we don’t understand these cultural differences. It’s also a disadvantage sometimes.

For example, when I first came to America, I found that it’s hard for me to speak up because the way that Americans speak up is very different.

Americans speak what is in their mind, and they jump on each other—they piggyback on each other.

I feel like the ball was going so fast in a conversation, I can’t even find my moment.

And I found my moment is—I have to interrupt. I have to kind of cut off the other person, which is something that is very culturally inappropriate in our culture.

In Asian culture, that means you’re cutting off your senior—your mom or your dad or your teacher.

So it’s very cultural to navigate that.

At first I was just like, oh my God, you know, I have to cut off the other person? Did I interrupt that person?

I had to navigate that in my own mind—that okay, no, that’s how they speak here. That’s how they flow here.

And it’s different.

So I have to learn the differences in order to fully join in, right?

Because sometimes if I don’t understand the difference, I also judge them—that, hey, they don’t give me any opportunity. They keep going, they piggyback on each other.

It almost feels like I don’t have time to speak, or no one asked me to share.

So that also created the feeling that they don’t include me—but they don’t have that intention either.

So when I understand the two differences and navigate through as an immigrant, I realize that, okay—I now know how it works here.

And I can participate based on how I understand the way to participate.

Okay, I have to speak up.

We don’t need to ask when, and I need to learn how to build on what other people say—acknowledge what they say—and be in a conversation dynamically.

Not waiting for my turn and writing my notes like before.

So yeah, there’s a lot of cultural nuances that, without being aware of it, can impede our participation into the bigger body of America.

And so I see that the more we understand different cultures—how to work together, acknowledging the differences, the strengths and also the weaknesses—then we can actually grow together.

And I also think that sometimes it’s not one way or the other.

Some ways that Asians are good at is—we wait and we really think, what do I really want to say?

And actually participate in a way that we know we have a valid point and a valid contribution.

From Showing Up to Belonging: How Presence Turns Into Connection - (2:46 Min.) Celine Fang, Executive Director, DOI250AA, Founder, BoostInMinutes.com

For showing up and being there.

And sometimes you just happen to show up at the right place
at the right time and contribute whatever is there.

For example, for me, there’s times that I show up on purpose,
but when I do that, I feel maybe my purpose may not be fulfilled
because of whatever the environment or things that transpire
during the time that I show up for it.

But sometimes when I just show up and I don’t really think about
what is my role, am I even fit to be there?

But just because there’s an opportunity to show up, and sometimes
it’s not even my own agenda.

I might be showing up there to help someone.
I may be showing up there to support another person that I know.
I may be showing up there to just check it out because it was
open to anyone.

I may be showing up just because it was on the way of where
I was going and I just wanted to peek in and see what happened.

And I feel a lot of those opportunities are very natural and
welcome for my presence to be there.

At least no one looks at me strange and says, “Hey, you don’t belong here.
Why are you here?”

So that makes me feel like, in that kind of environment,
I can contribute anything.

You know, I could say hi to people, I can hold the door,
I could get a cup of water, I can help hold the table.

I could contribute any kind of service because that’s a breaking
ice point.

That’s more than just saying hi to a person and expecting
a conversation to happen, but helping around makes people feel like,
“Hey, you care.”

And then they get me more and more involved, and deeper and deeper
on a deeper level.

And I built some good relationships just because of showing up
and being there because I didn’t really expect what would happen.

But they end up advancing more than just being there.

Stop Asking, Start Speaking: Finding Your Voice in the Moment - (2:36 Min.) Celine Fang, Executive Director, DOI250AA, Founder, BoostInMinutes.com

Showing up and speaking up. So Randy Weihaur is the founder of Awaken Inner Voice and he specialized in helping people with expression and things like that. And so he always tell us when you need to speak up, don’t be shy or there was this event we were at and I I kind of got past it, but someone just keep on saying, can I ask a question?

Can I say this? Can I say that? And for Weihaur’s training and encouragement and he does special things for that kind of situation. But he was just telling people don’t, don’t ask, you know, if you need to speak up, speak up.

And we always pick on that person and laugh at them because they still asking the same thing. It’s just a habit. And every time we tell them you don’t need to ask, just just talk. So that that’s a good friend of ours anyway.

And I share at the retreat that I was the one who used to ask, is it my turn to speak? Can I tell something? Can I talk? You know, I do that as well.

And Randy is someone I work with for a long time and he always pick on me and scold at me and say don’t do that. So that that was, you know, a, a good encouragement. And sometimes you don’t just tell people you don’t do that, but you, you tell them why you make them understand why not and you make them feel comfortable of not not asking for permission to speak.

I mean, they’re, they’re sometimes we do take turns, but sometimes we don’t just because, you know, you let the conversation flow, don’t waste the time to even ask that question because that’s thirty seconds taking out of the time.

Or sometimes you’re kind of giving up the authority in the room by asking permissions like that. So.

Reading the Room: Finding the Balance Between Listening and Speaking Up - (5:25 Min.) Celine Fang, Executive Director, DOI250AA, Founder, BoostInMinutes.com

I, I think for me it’s really based on the audience.

Even though I feel comfortable, I, I know what I want to say,
but sometimes it, you know, I mirror myself based on the person
or the, the group that I’m speaking to.

And if I feel like, you know, they are at the same level, I
speak just about the same level of language and tone and context
because I know we could communicate at that level.

But sometimes if I’m guessing, you know, I, I, I have some other
immigrant groups, I know they’re not so good in English.

And when I talk to them, I feel like my English somehow went
down several levels just because I have to look for the right
order to describe.

Well.

Well, I feel like, you know, I’m questioning myself.
Do they understand, you know, where where should I need to keep
the tone or the the explanation to be?

And sometimes they are looking at me and I can’t guess whether
they understand or not or they just giving me the respect by
looking at me.

So it’s different when you talk one-on-one or one to a few
people or to a large group of audience.

Because when I talk to a larger group, I know I’m just
there to say what I have to say.

And some people going to resonate, some people going to listen.

I know not the whole entire room because a lot of times people
are having their own conversation or they’re on their phone
and their attention is somewhere else.

But when it’s one-on-one, it, it just takes me a minute to,
you know, gauge on that interaction and see where is that person’s
mind at and, you know, at what capacity can I communicate
with them?

So, but yeah, so we’re, we’re talking about participation in
America two fifty and we want to carry the civic engagement
skills beyond just those celebration events because that helps
the community to communicate and get to know each other.

And sometimes it’s just to show up and be helpful, be non-threatening,
be not of an agenda.

Like I have a business to promote.

Years ago I was, I had this friend that I talked to often and
when she somehow joined a network marketing company, I was the
first person she wanted to recruit.

And at that time, I didn’t know any better.
I just kind of joined whatever people asked me to.

And they were selling vitamins and stuff.

And I don’t know what kind of training she went to, but the
way she was doing it, she had her outline person.

And they would go places to places, to a restaurant, to somebody’s
office, to a friend’s house.

And they would just barge in and sit there and entitle to that
space and start talking.

And they talk until somebody say yes to OK I would join you,
I will buy you.

But they didn’t understand, you know, for me, I was just looking,
is this the way you do things?

People just wanted to brush you off.
That’s why they wanted to buy their product.

For me, I just, you know, regardless of how many of those meetings I
went with them, I couldn’t train myself of doing that.

It’s just it, it didn’t go well with me.

And then they had to tell, you know, everybody they recruit,
this is so successful because, you know, we are totally believe
in this product and we could just go and talk to everybody.

It’s like they were so brainwashed and they they feel that righteousness
like they need to spread this good news around the world.

But, you know, I I think sometimes we all have different experience
and in our brain.

Of course, when I was little, I was trained in the way that
when other people are talking, don’t interrupt.

You know, you got to be a good kid, be polite, give the other
people the the right of way first.

Like Randy say, if I gave them that right of way, I would never
go anywhere.

But yeah.

And, and then some other experiences just that when I saw how
people are so, you know, entitled to taking up that space.

And I feel like, hey, that’s, that’s not right either.

So sometimes I have to keep a balance just to, to feel the room
first and see how I could jump in and how I can contribute.

But once I breakthrough my own eyes, I feel more comfortable
and I contribute more.

And I’ve done things that a lot of people didn’t think I could
ever done anyway.

So it it just takes that little effort to get started.

Connect With DOI250AA

We’d love to hear from you—community members, sponsors, partners, cultural enthusiasts, educators, and friends. Your insight and support help us bridge cultures, generations, and regions. Use the contact form or email us at support@doi250aa.net. For mail: 5831 Forward Ave, Unit #918, Pittsburgh, PA 15217

Request To Join Voice Across America Community Exchange

Check To Opt-In

14 + 9 =

Please answer the math question to help us prevent robotic spam.

Take the Reflection Survey & Receive a Free Copy of The Quiet Awakening